the stepmother, from her point of view

when i took this vowel , to honor you and you honor me
and we are to be down for each other through thick and thin and thick as thieves
I for you and you for me, when we agreed to make this family blended and extended together, because of the love we share for one another,

we both came to the table of love, with added additions that came from our past love and lost of love
but we join together in complete matrimonial bliss, and in unity and i said i do, and you reciprocated the i dos with the i love yous will you be my wife and can we make this work and do what it do,
with the almighty eyes holy covering our union that he put together and let no man, or woman, pull us apart or  6 feet under down with stress, strife and bitter jealousy because of the ex non resilience to move on,

And when you gave me or she, the same offer, they said no , and constantly gave you the run around
and when i said yes, let the games begin, 1. dropping the kids unannounced , 2 using the kids as a pawn to get you to do things, that she should of accepted when you wanted to do them for  she, but now that you have moved on, the hate starts to surface saying words of bitter hurt to the new love you have in your life that said yes to you, that i will love you through thick and thin, through the ups and downs , the backs and forth and still respecting this love and the longevity of this love that brought us together in the first place,

 and she's using the love that they had for family's and in-laws when they held the crown to be in that place. forever trying to get them to go against you, because the love you have now made the decision that they failed to make, so they go on this mission to scope out and deceive others to manipulate situations
to go in there favor to get the new in-laws in your life to throw shade and daggers at you. but be strong my sister, because remember the bond and the vowels you both took, let no one pull you apart, if they don't want to be civil and respectable, forsake all and cling to your mate .

and the love you have for your mate, and the children that become blended to this family, sometimes the ex use the children to undermined the household on purpose because the mothers gave them strict instructions to do so, but the love you have for each other and you bring this up to your mate at first he may be blinded by the love he has for his children but when the craziness and the drama comes to a point of no return, then the father of the children has to put his foot down and say, you have a mother and if you don't respect my new house hold, you have no choice too keep your stance and anger in a kids place, and when you go home to your mama tell her to play her positions and stay in her lane, and lets raise these children in a supportive co parenting, stable adult households.

as a stepmother no one ever stands up and advocate what she has to go through, its not easy and overtime it will get better, but my motto to all you women out there that or stepmothers, if the family can't be in complete harmony pray first, talk to your husband, and let the ex know, that the role that they could of played has a permanent position that has been filled,. remember you said no, and i said yes, so play your role and go on with your life, because the time and energy that you are putting in and using the kids to advance and enhance your schemes is not going to get you any where and in the long run, it puts a strain on the relationship with the kids and there father, as you downgrade the children  relationship with there father, degrading him to the point the children grow up not having respect and the honor and giving the father disrespect because of the bitterness you display when the kids our in your presence; like the bible says honor your father and your mother if you do things will go well for you;

because i always say, if you can't respect me, as your stepmother, you don't even have to call me mommy but just respect me, as your fathers wife, your brother and sisters mother, and me as a women of this house- hold that you benefit from the accommodations as well and if you don't want to comply your mother is just a phone call away, and i will do everything i can to respect you as a child and my husbands offspring but you will have to play your role, and your positions to make this work.

but if not the corruption in my household will not be tolerated, the stepmother, has feelings too, and i am sure the world has many stepmothers point of views, that they deal with, your not wishing the children no harm but they can always go back home to there mothers, and entertain all the negativity in that household all they want,

so to all the stepmothers out there wear this badge so if you don't want to play your part and play it cool theirs always a place at you mamas  to act a fool.

the stepmother by helen burnett-davis